30 Jul When you’re struck with self-doubt: 4 questions to ask yourself to hear your inner voice.
We all have instincts. We all have ways of knowing but sometimes we are not tuned in, or maybe our judgement is clouded by other factors. When we don’t act in alignment with instinct we feel it in our body as it creates tension.
How can you know what is right? How can you speak up? How can you listen to you? And what is the consequence of not doing this?
As a new mother you may be feeling that you can’t listen to your own voice because you have little experience of caring for a baby.
Everything feels uncertain.
You want an expert to tell you how to do it.
But who is the expert of your baby?
Who has spent the most time with them? You.
4 questions to ask yourself when you feel self-doubt.
1. What are the facts? Your evidence-base is your baby and your circumstances. Spend some time noticing. Use all your senses. Work with now. Babies cannot manipulate us, they are working solely with their instinct.
2. What do YOU want to do? Don’t overthink this. This is your baby, your life, your choice. What is right for someone else may not be right for you. Tune in to your bodily response, it is your guide.
3. What are the other things influencing you? Friends, family, media, healthcare professionals. Each may have interesting and useful perspectives to bring to your situation – but the ultimate responsibility is with you. If what they are suggesting makes you feel uneasy, tense, upset then it’s not right for you. We can never be 100% certain and we have to get comfortable with that uncertainty on our own terms. No one else will be in your shoes having made your decisions. If the noise from these various influences is too confusing selectively tune them out, minimise the noise – are they relevant to you?
4. Is there a decision to be made or can you take a wait and see approach? Asking this question creates space. It is a breather. If there is no urgency then a wait and see/ do nothing approach gives you time. Sometimes we create false urgency, bring attention to your here and now and be curious with wait and see. This allow more time for you to find clarity.
If you are interested in working through any postnatal/new mother issues you have please get in touch, I have a one-to-one 6 week package available. Book a free clarity call with me to find out more at https://www.mirandawebb.co.uk